Posted by
Katy Grimes on Friday, July 18, 2008 5:43:37 PM
Last week I wrote a column that has really angered a great number of "Generation X" readers. Frankly, it should have angered even more.
irst, there were the Baby Boomers, the original “Me” generation (1946-1964). They produced the next “Me” generation: Generation X, also known as “The Entitlement Genera-tion” (1964-1984). Now, last century’s most self-absorbed generation have produced another “Me” generation, the “Look at Me” generation.
Why should we even care? Their kids are more self absorbed, self obsessed and desperate for attention than any previous people that ever walked the earth.
Don’t know what I am talking about? Open your eyes. The spoiled, hyper-sensitive, self-esteem children of the Baby Boomers are reproducing. The bratty, self-indulgent, spoiled and disloyal Gen Xers are now having kids. Today’s entertainment supports this, with YouTube videos, MySpace Web pages and “reality” TV shows where people act stupid, eat bugs, have sex and sing out of key in front of a camera and a live audience. When I was growing up in the 60s and 70s, there were no “reality” programs on TV. If you were stupid enough to make a fool of yourself in public, you went into hiding and prayed no one recognized you.
The “Me” generations of parents think that everything their kids do is worthy of a “wow” and a reward. Doing what used to be expected is exceptional today; eating one bite of dinner elicits clapping and immediate dessert. Getting in the car gets a high-five and a “good job.” Interrupting a conversation between adults by saying, “excuse me, excuse me, excuse me, excuse me” begets the child an excited “Thank you honey,” instead of a stern “shhh.” (
read the rest of the column here)
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The angry comments and letters in response to this column were... well... wimpering, emotional, whiny diatribes from Gen X'rs. I did however, receive a few letters from older people (over the age of 40) who agreed with the column, as evidenced by their own children and grandchildren. Ouch.
First, here are the comments from the SacUnion website:
Next, here is one young fellow's letter:
Ms. Grimes,
Re: your article entitled "From the Entitlement Generation to the Look at Me Generation", SacUnion July 4, 2008
I disliked this article, not just because it was a one-person rant against an entire generation of Americans, but more because it was a factual and logical mess. Rather than list point by point my problems with the article, let me summarize as best I can. I'm a Gen Xer, born 1973 (Gen X is largely considered kids born between 1965-1982, also the baby bust, as there are so few of us), children of primarily early boomers and also the beat generation. Generation X has often been called the "Slacker Generation", but never the "Entitlement Generation", which is also known as Gen Y and the echo-boom(roughly 1982-1995), mostly comprised of children of later Baby Boomers. Gen X's kids, to the extent they're born yet, are generally still in their early school years. Your concerns seem to relate to Gen Y, the kids in their late teens and 20s, the Lindsey Lohan, Girls Gone Wild crowd (I have similar problems with this generation as you do--which is why it frustrates me that you got your dates and labels all wrong). So you spend the bulk of your article wrongly singling out Gen X, falsely criticizing their parenting of a generation of kids they didn't raise, and making lame 15 year old references to our "goatees." Sorry, "Reality Bites" came out 13 years ago, and I think even Ethan Hawke's goatee is gone now (for reference purposes, Mr Hawke was born in 1970 and his 2 children are 10 and 6 years old). Even your specific criticisms (such as current TV programs, which are produced by Baby Boomers, self esteem movements of the 80s, which were created by Baby Boomers) don't relate to us. Here's how Time Magazine described Gen Xers:
"They possess only a hazy sense of their own identity but a monumental preoccupation with all the problems the preceding generation will leave for them to fix . . who fall between the famous baby boomers and the boomlet of children the baby boomers are producing...By and large, the [Gen X] group scornfully rejects the habits and values of the baby boomers, viewing that group as self-centered, fickle and impractical. While the baby boomers had a placid childhood in the 1950s, which helped inspire them to start their revolution, [this] generation grew up in a time of drugs, divorce and economic strain. . .They feel influenced and changed by the social problems they see as their inheritance: racial strife, homelessness, AIDS, fractured families and federal deficits"
Seems like a decent target audience for the Sac Union, the frustrated younger adults who enjoyed the Reagan years and hate the 60s, but so much for that, then. While it is classic Baby Boomer behavior to blame your children for the world the Baby Boomers largely ruined and still control, is it too much to ask that at least you make a coherent argument and do a little factual research to support it? Even if your criticisms had been correctly leveled against Gen Y, logically much of the blame for these kids' behavior should fall squarely on the parents who set absolutely no boundaries for them. And that would be...well, yes, those Baby Boomers again. My experience has been that Gen X, which included the first large numbers of latchkey kids and children of divorces, cares a great deal that we don't raise our children in the amoral directionless way that many of our parents did, and looks to our grandparents for inspiration. We take marriage much more seriously, and tend to wait to have children until we're ready to care for them. Too bad there may not be enough of us to make a difference. Thanks for the kick in the ribs anyway, hope it made you feel better.
Sincerely,
Joel Erb
Sacramento, California
and here is another interesting piece:
Ms Grimes,
Well your article seems to have triggered a good debate. I'm hoping I can appeal to your sense of fairness and decency as I ask you two questions. I know your time is valuable so I'll keep this short.
#1. The level of anger in the tone of your op-ed piece and in Dennis Johnson's email as truly surprised me. Why are successful, white upper class members of our culture so fearful of decenting ideas or observations that they lash out in such negative ways? I see so much anger and fear leveled at the world by Boomers. This anxiety diminishes your valid point that there is an "entitlement" attitude amongst Gen X. I agree with you that many of my generation suffer from a lack patients and an appitite for things not earned. But there is no deeper digging into what creates this mindset. Which brings me to my second question,
#2. Why shouldn't Xers think that they deserve things right now? Though this is a morally inexcusable mindset it is the pervaiding mindset of the most of the people in our country. Look at the level of personal debt individuals carry in this country. The Instant Gratification Fix is like a drug that our civilization is addicted to. Bigger homes with bigger cars with bigger TV's and it goes on and on. Your generation's seeming inabilty to stop and figure out that freedom and fulfillment don't come from buying power or consumption has delivered all of you guys into unhappiness. Being aware that you are a loved and unique Human Being and that we all are connected has always been the path to personal and collective peace. This view is essentailly the Christian worldview minus the Diety requirement.
My generation has a host of problems and I myself take pride in pointing out our flaws, addressing them and solving them. But pointing out problems is not whining, it is seeing structural flaws in our culture and fixing them. A disease cannot be cured if it is not pointed out, observed and altered. The healing and understanding that needs to take place has to happen hand in hand with between our generations. I say lets set aside acromony and fix OUR problems. Are you on board for that?
I'm hoping at some level what I've said makes sense and I look forward to you offering solid, empathetic soltuions to our disagreements.
Ken Willis
Mr. Willis's letter was a follow up to one that he sent to the Editor at The Sacramento Union, that I and another reader responded to.
I Agree with Grimes
Re: “Shocked by Grimes” by
letter writer Ken Willis; published July 11, 2008 in The Union.
Editor: I agree with Katy. Ken Willis on the other hand did not; he professed to be “speechless” (too bad he was not), but then goes on a whiny tirade about his generation being the first to have a lower standard of living than the previous due to the uncontrolled consumerism of the Boomers, having fewer opportunities at decent employment due to outsourcing, unaffordable healthcare, dwindling energy supplies and the fact that they will never have a chance at retirement. His crystal ball seems to be a bit gloomy. When Katy called them lazy and whiny, she forgot quitters. I have interviewed many of Mr. Willis’ generation for jobs. A lot think that they are God’s gift to the working world because they have been told how wonderful they are (and believe it) their whole life. Many DO feel entitled and do not think that they have to pay their dues like the rest of us did. They want the BMW, the corner office, the VP title and they want it NOW! As for the consumerism of my generation (the Boomers), it was NOT my generation that got us into the sub-prime mess. It was not my generation that wanted the biggest and the best house right away (despite not having the money to pay for it). Unlike Mr. Willis, I do not talk about those of my generation who served; I served in the Marines myself and did a tour in Vietnam. I got out of the Marines, went to college and worked my way up in this world. Actions speak louder than words. So, is Mr. Willis going to continue to complain about what he does not have and what he cannot do (and continue to make Katy’s point about people like him) or is he actually going to stop blaming others and do something constructive for once in his life?
Dennis Johnson
Woodland
Editor’s Note: To read a special response from columnist Katy Grimes addressing this matter, visit www.SacUnion.com.
And of course, here is my repsponse:
Last week a reader responded to my column “From The Entitlement Generation to the Look At Me Generation,” with a letter to the Editor. His response was very personal; he obviously did not care for my message.
Identifying sociological generational characteristics obviously involves generalizations, but this is nothing new; all groups of individuals get generalized. For example, I’ve been called a “dumb blonde,” as well as a “conservative b***h.”
Every generation is stereotyped. That is why I cited research. The young man who took the time to write the letter complaining about my generalizations of Baby Boomers, Gen X and the new “Look at me generation,” did not appreciate being called a slacker or my telling him to get a haircut. Being defensive usually means identifying with the accusation – even mildly.
But then he threw out the Iraq card. Yes, thousands of young men and women signed up for military service after 9/11, which is truly commendable. The writer should take notice that I did not write a word about Gen X military personnel. In fact, I’ve been vociferous in my support of America’s military. My own son is one of those young military men, who has chosen a career in the Navy during wartime.
The study of Sociology is a scientific and systematic study of society, patterns of social relationships, social interaction, and culture. Do I like being called a spoiled, self-centered Baby Boomer? No, but I am not spoiled nor self-centered. If I struck a nerve, think about why.
Katy Grimes
What is that fabulous expression..."Buck up or shut up." Why doesn't anyone tell these whiners to "shut up?"